《最愚蠢的一代》

一些摘录:

“一个人的成长与成熟,在很大程度上得益于垂直的模范作用… … 与此形成鲜明对比的是,网络倡导的确实更多横向的榜样作用。

网络是消费者的栖息地,而不是教育性环境。

教育能够让人民保持独立自主,而一旦缺失教育,代表人民利益的制度将会在可以预见的未来发生倒退,形成另一种专制。”

Narcissistic Father

“There is profound unhappiness among the members of a family ruled by a tyrannical narcissistic father. In many of these families, the mother simply echoes the father as she feels uncertain of herself (due to his emotional abuse) and is afraid to take her husband on. Often this destructive pattern is the result of the mother’s own childhood. Not aware of the dynamics of narcissism, she went from a cruel, tyrannical father to a brutal, domineering husband. Repetition of psychological patterns, such as is seen with abuse and narcissism, is common. The mother chooses a spouse similar to her abusive parent and raises a family in an abusive environment like the one she was raised in.”

Source

Struggling with the past

I’ve been self-sabotaging a lot recently.

When I was growing up, instead of giving credit when credit is due, my parents kept belittling me, and telling me “you can’t do this”or”you’re not smart enough”. And I f***ing believed it, and internalized it. I didn’t have a choice, did I? I was just a kid.

Now even I can make my choice, the mocking voice is still there. I delibrately don’t do well, because based on my past experience, no matter how good I do, I’m not doing well, so I’d better just do nothing.

I know their opinions don’t count. I know that I have free will to make all kinds of choices. But the effect the past has on me now is still unbelivable.

I’ve read all about it. Now I have to make changes, step by step. It’s painful, but I have to do it. It’s MY choice this time.

Peace and love.

Elon Musk: “I don’t care about hope, enthusiasm or motivation.”

Question: how do you stay focused and motivated when things don’t go the way you’d hoped?

Elon: My drive to get it done is somewhat disconnected from hope, enthusiasm or anything else. I actually don’t care about hope or enthusiasm or motivation. I just give everything I’ve got irrespective of what the circumstances may be. You just keep going and get it done.

My two cents:

I don’t think Elon has no hopes, enthusiasm or motivation. It would have been very difficult to have accomplished what he has without any of the three. What he really means is that when confronting a problem, instead of being stuck in fear, you actually have a choice. You can force yourself to look at the big picture, create a plan to deal with the problem, and execute your plan. The good news is, the more you deliberately train yourself to do it, the more ease you’ll feel when facing future problems.

Most people are just trapped in fear, never realizing that there’s always a way out.

 

Source video on Youtube

Morning routine(simple yet working)

Inspired by “My Morning Routine” from zenhabit. Link at the very end.

So my morning routine now is:

  • wake up
  • get dressed (if I’m still wearing my pajama, it doesn’t quite feel like a new day has started)
  • check tweets (I’m a student, and I follow university, the library, local news)
  • prepare breakfast
  • write down 3 most important things to do today
  • eat breakfast
  • work

Changes:

  • I don’t read news in the morning anymore, because it has been such a distraction. I’d keep thinking about what I’ve read after breakfast while I work. Have to drop it.
  • No shower in the morning. I do it in the evening instead.

My morning routine on Zenhabits

Boundary not balance for happy workaholics

“The concept of life/work balance isn’t that helpful for us, because there’s always more work to do, we’re eager to do it, and we wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Years ago my colleague Michael Gilbert suggested that we substitute “boundaries” for “balance”: while balance requires an unsteady equilibrium among the various demands on our time and energy, boundaries offer a sustainable means of keeping things in their proper place.”

Source